Monday, 22 July 2013

Who do YOU talk to?

A bit of a different post today.

It's said that being a woman is like being an internet browser with about 8 tabs open at a time.

I think that Offspring's Nina Proudman is a character that connects with women because she has a lot of internal chatter. Some of it uncomfortable.

Some of it is just banalities. What to pick up from the supermarket. Who to call.

A lot of it has a bit more of an emotional edge. Fears. Doubts. Worries. Worries about stuff that will in all likelihood never, ever eventuate. Assumptions about what other people think.

Stuff that, if it is said out loud, loses power, as it doesn't make a great deal of sense, or is unhelpful.

When there are too many tabs open full of crap (say facebook, twitter, a few unhelpful diets, and 3 email accounts) it can be overwhelming.

It can make the computer shit itself and go all slowly. We need a way to press ctrl-alt-delete on it.

A good internal "ctrl-alt-delete" mechanism is a good thing. We all need to tell ourselves "stop, just hang on" sometimes.

It is really important, too, that we have an external ctrl-alt-delete mechanism. A person to talk to, that we can workshop some of the cray-cray shit with.

One that won't judge or necessarily offer solutions, but reinforce our own trust in ourselves. One that we trust, that we can make ourselves vulnerable to, that we feel safe with. It is a function of both the person and our own ability to put trust in others.

It is good if we have somebody in our lives like that.

Even if we have to pay them to take that role!

So tell me...

Do you have an 8-tab browser mind?
Can you press ctrl-alt-delete on yourself?
Do you have a person who you can download to?


  1. SUCH good questions!

    I have a few people I unload to, but I think I'm quite a private person and also quite a proud person, so I struggle to talk about my insecurities. My current housemate is always going about how much exercise she's done, how fat she looks in photos, how none of her clothes suit her, blahblahbalhb. I find it very draining to listen to, which isn't very supportive, but it's mainly because I am so the complete opposite of this and keep such insecurities to myself!

    Also, I need to get back into yoga. That was the best ctrl-alt-delete ever.

    1. I am the same - quite loath to tell people what is going on, and I don't like to burden people with things. I also fear they might judge me.
      I find it quite rewarding to talk myself through things too, nowadays.
      I find pilates or running makes me feel better, mentally.

  2. Yes which is why I come here to mentally switch off as well. In fact I timed it so I would avoid media onslaught about the royal baby. We are way too bombarded by useless information.

    1. Indeed.
      Really- as nice as a baby is, the royals are a bit irrelevant, IMHO. Kate and wills are nice and pretty and shiny but don't add a lot.
      Very flattered that, even though you are shutting off, you still come visit my blog! :)

  3. Just 8 tabs??? :D

    I don't have a good internal ctrl-alt-delete mechanism. I'm a compulsive thinker. The only thing that works is to fill my mind with other stuff so that I'm not constantly aware of the things I'd like to delete. Playing piano, composing music, or reading something with high concentration can do that at times.

    My person-to-talk-to is my husband Peter. It's really good to have him.