Goals Update: Broken New Year's Resolutions. Stuff I am into.

So you know how I wrote a set of goals for the new year a month or so ago. Some work related, some travel related, some fitness related. I wanted to update you on them.

The "only travel locally" goal: broken.

I've been thinking about Israel and Jordan for ages now. It is high time I went, and travel is life for me. I have not yet found out about changes to my work (see below) but I have booked it, and soon (mid-late March). I am going with G Adventures. I needed a trip to look forward to. It's on like Donkey Kong, people. IVF after that.

Details of trip here.

Regarding the fitness things, they are going great guns. I have commissioned one of my coaches at crossfit to do some 1:1 sessions to help me to achieve my fitness goals. I can now do 2 double unders in a row.

Regarding the box jump, I have got my hands onto a Swamp Box, my mate Emma was giving hers away for free. This is essentially a large high density foam box the size of the wooden one, so I can jump without fear of my shins.

Regarding the career things.... I have been a bit quiet on this blog because there has been a bit of pushing and wheeling. I went for an interview last week (see my outfit on instagram - it was on point). I find out tomorrow or Tuesday whether I got it. I am nervous. When I get nervous I get heartburn or stomach upset. I have it now :(

There were a few other interviewees. The interview itself was very short, and we were led in and out of the interview room so we didn't come face to face with other interviewees. Is that a thing? All very cloak and dagger.

Another job in a different department has come up in the same place, which I have also gone for. I hope to get both, so I can consolidate close to home. It's good not to have to drive around.

Research wise, I am finishing what I started, but also being invited onto other projects as a co-Investigator. This will hopefully yield papers but without as much grunt.

Last Friday, I made a trip into the city. It was a couple of weeks after the horror of the people killed by a murderous driver. I was bracing myself for it to be really sad and sombre. Instead, I ran into a street party of sorts.... buskers making money for the victim's families. It was a real party atmosphere. The blokes looked like metal heads but were playing flamenco tunes while head-banging. People were smiling and dancing. I became overwhelmingly proud of my city.

 

I went into the Mothership (David Jones). I looked at the cosmetics. I found some things I liked, which I will share here:

Niche Perfumes, like this one (Akkad, by Lubin). I like to smell a bit spicy, expensive and different to others. All mainstream perfumes smell roughly the same to me. I have run out of Black Afghan by Nasomatto and am now on the hunt for a new signature scent.

My good mate SSG has got me rather hooked on cosmetics. I am after a nice go to eye palette, as, like her, I am not terribly fond of L'Oreal le palette nude. I also would like to have some peachy/pinky shades.

I already have cult products Nars Orgasm blush, Nars Laguna Bronzer, and Chanel Fantasme eyeshadow/sparkles. I cannot go past Lancome Virtuose mascara - no other mascara is nearly as good on my eyes.

I need to put a lid on the spending..... maybe that needs to be another goal.

I am starting to get into home cooking again, having got into a bit of a rut - SSG, being the oracle of good things, has put me onto Recipe Tin Eats, which has some super easy, super tasty food.

Do you have a go to fragrance, mascara, or tasty dish? Share here.

 

Spent.

I often work on the weekends - writing PhDs, papers, ethics submissions, et cetera. I still do plenty of other things, and get a sleep - in.

This weekend, I actually went into work! Like actual work where my workwear game must be up to scratch, I must be there at 0800, and I must be able to make sentences which make sense. Both days!

It was something a bit different to what I usually do, and it was fun and challenging, but gosh I am tired after it all, and I have had to nap.

Melbourne has been thrust well and truly into winter, with very chilly mornings and a bit of rain. Winter means boots and stockings and socks, and also Masterchef.

We are getting teasers of my beloved Offspring. I do hope it hasn't jumped the shark. I hope that Leo and Nina are still together, but I get the feeling from the ads that this will not be the case. I would love to see Nina getting settled and maybe getting preggers again, and I can't wait to see Zoe.

It has just struck me how invested I am in the show, like I am talking about my friends. I think that was the case for a lot of people.

In addition to having to work, my exercise at the holy church of crossfit has been a bit waylaid by popping my back out last Monday. I have decided to go and do some clinical Pilates. I have exercise goals which I think will be improved by having a good core. Also, it has worked in the past for staving off back pain, from which I suffer on and off.

How was your weekend?
Anything exciting this week?

Wins.

Happy hump day folks.

As I have alluded to, I have been angling for some extra sessions at work. There is a job that went out, and has been a bit slow to come to fruition (ie interviews etc). The reason for this is that there has been some upheaval in the unit, and they have not been able to delineate the roles.

Anyway, long story short, I told the team that I was going away for 2 weeks, and did they want to interview me before I left. They did, and applauded my persistence. They offered me the job, and I said yes. This was yesterday.

I hope I don't have to push them to get my paperwork done..the thing I am most looking forward to is the pay!

Yesterday, I also gave a lecture to a health sciences school at a different university. The seminar was full, lots of bums on seats; even the Dean attended. I don't know whether it will come to anything but good to have it done and dusted, and that it went off successfully and was enjoyed.

I am nearly finished a second draft of my paper. I am culling words like a skilled surgeon. 

Warning Crossfit things ahead! 

Every week, our Box releases a WOD (workout of the day) as a spotlight of one member. On Monday, I had my member spotlight. Here it is. So exciting. It was enjoyed (cursed) by many.

It's been 1RM (one rep-max) week at crossfit. A one-rep max is the heaviest weight of a particular lift you can perform once. Unfortunately for the lifts I have done, I have not been able to meet my previous PB (personal best). I think it is because I have been training pretty hard, and am potentially a bit tired. Though I am hoping to exceed 82.5kg for my deadlift this week.

In box jump news, that is progressing. I am better at jumping over rather than jumping on. Today I put a PVC bar on top of a 20 inch box, so the end was hanging off. Hence if I missed I would just knock over a very light bar. I am now glad to say that my jump is over 20 inches (21.5 including the bar). I am getting springy, people!

Ok Crossfit stuff over.

Sunday was a bit of an off day. Long time readers might know about the epic PMS I suffer.
We were out to brekky on Sunday morning, at a cafe. I was feeling a bit fragile (might've been some red wine I drank). We were sat out the front with the dog.

Two Audi 4WDs, one black, one white, rolled up and parked. From out of the black Audi a young woman and her man emerge. They pluck a little baby from his carseat out the back, and a bugaboo or other prestige stroller from the boot. They greet the couple from the white Audi. The mum strokes the pregnant belly of White Audi lady, whose hair is long and groomed in hair-straightener curls.

I promptly silently burst into tears, and dripped snot and tears into my breakfast eggs, rendering them inedible. I was not that hungry anyway. I was in a funk for the rest of the day. I have had enough emotionally shitty days to know that it's often just a day, and it's about muddling through. So even though I felt shit, I got shit done. I did stuff up until it was time to go to bed.

Happy rest of the week, folks.

Open workout 16.5 - the end.

Today I completed the last workout of my first Crossfit open.

I was quite pumped, as there was very little that I could not manage.

However, if you ask any crossfitter what their least favourite exercises are, the two most common answers would be thrusters and burpees.

So finding out the workout on Friday really wiped the smile off my face

21-18-15-12-9-6-3

Thrusters (20kg)
Burpees.

So do 21 thrusters, then 21 bar facing burpees, jumping over the bar,
then 18 and 18, and so on.
That's 84 of each exercise. 164 reps in total.

To give you an idea of what the exercises entail, see below:


Here are thrusters

And here are bar-facing burpees

Just to clarify, I did not do them nearly as quickly as this guy. I had to do a few steps to get up to the bar. But that's the gist.

Crossfit workouts are often both physically and mentally challenging, and this is what I like about them. For a normal crossfit day, I will check the workout the night before, psychologically prepare, and think up modifications. However, in the open, no such modifications are possible, everybody does the same.

However, no modifications are possible in the open workouts, and you have to do them exactly as prescribed - this is the "scaled" version, the Rx version for women was 29kg on the bar.

For the first time, I had a freak-out. I even contemplated not going and doing the workout. A few things were running through my head.

• It's going to take Foreverrrrrrr and people will be watching and I will be embarrassed.
• I will fall over and break my ankle jumping over the bar (often workouts prescribe jumping over a bar, and I don't do them out of this fear - I have a real ankle phobia after twisting mine a couple of times)
• I will hurt myself
• The workout will hurt.

However, despite my misgivings, I went in.  I went first. I was scored by one of the coaches.

It did hurt, and I did feel weak at times. I broke it up into chunks (ie 4 thrusters then rest). The burpees were super slow but I kept moving.

I did finish last. Everyone who finished came to cheer me on. They gave me a countdown to lift the bar up, so I didn't rest too long. When pausing to start the burpees, they yelled "get down" so I didn't rest too long. When I wanted to take a rest while I was face down at the bottom of a burpee they yelled "get up". They also yelled "you are doing so well" and "you are looking strong".

Finally it finished, and I got a big round of applause. I threw myself down on the floor and caught my breath. In fact, pretty much everyone who completed the WOD did that. It was difficult for everyone.

It's going to sound a bit twee, but I was proud of myself. I fought off the fears and excuses, which I have used frequently in the past. I often avoid movements or reps because I think I am too fat, too slow, too unfit. My mind causes a fail before my body does, often. This was a good lesson, and I now have confidence to work towards a box jump.

(It also helps that the coaches have bought padded boxes, so no skinned shins).

I think I will sleep well tonight.

Proud.

It finally happened. On Friday, I had the graduation ceremony, conferring me with my PhD.

People ask me how it feels - it feels surreal. The work is ongoing - today I was in at work, entering data for another paper. My career in research is not over, only just starting. The postnominal PhD is lovely but immaterial to what I do, in a way.

Melbourne was putting on some spectacularly shitty rainy windy weather, after a hot one the day before. I worked in the morning, and in the afternoon, my sister came into town. We met at Jimmy Watson's for a celebratory beverage and snack. This nice fella greeted us at the door. I told him we were celebrating the conferring of my PhD that evening. He took my hand and took us to the bar, asked the bartender to get some glasses and pour little sips into the glass for us to toast. We sat to drink a proper glass or two, intermittently chatting with the regulars. My sister, reluctant to leave her baby too long, headed down back down to the Peninsula, and I went to the uni to don Regalia, and wander about for an hour before we were briefed as to the ceremony protocol. Thankfully it was a PhD-only ceremony, so it was good and short.

Soon enough, we had the ceremony. We proceeded into the hall to choristers singing in Latin. I had no idea what they were singing, but it was very stirring. Finally my name and doctoral citation was read out, and I managed to doff my bonnet and shake hands and doff my bonnet again appropriately. I watched everyone else come down after receiving their testamur - the all had proud smiles.

The occasional speech was given by Professor Suzanne Cory, an eminent molecular biologist. There is now a Selective-entry secondary school named after her, in Werribee, where I grew up. It is good to see that smart westie kids are being valued and given access to special opportunities. There was nothing like this when I was going to school, 20 years ago.

This was my view for much of the ceremony.

All the bonnets being looked down upon by Jesus. Wilson Hall is beautiful. This view gave me shivers down my spine.

After the ceremony, my supervisor, who joined the academic procession, met me for a photo

He and his wife came back to my place for some drinks (Veuve Cliquot) and food. I remember before I started the PhD somebody saying to me that PhD supervisors and their students have a very special relationship. I didn't believe it at the time, but I do now. This bloke above is a very important, benevolent and special person in my life, and has seen me through a lot through the last 5 years. He believed in me when I struggled to believe in myself. His patience, kindness and generosity has made me want to do him proud.

~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day, I got up bright and early for Crossfit open 16.4 (you didn't think you'd come away without some xfit rantings, would you?). In a positively restrained fashion, I had only consumed 2 glasses of Veuve the previous evening and been to bed fairly early, so I felt fresh as a daisy.

The WOD was as follows

13 minutes AMRAP

• 55 deadlifts, 43kg
• 55 Wall Balls, 4 kg (Wall balls - squat to depth, come up, throw ball at 9 ft line, catch ball, squat to depth, repeat x55)
• 55 Calorie row
• 55 Hand release pushups (push-ups on toes)

I just about finished the row, so never got to challenge my push-up abilities. I don't think I have ever had such burn in my quads. I was happy that I gave it my best shot and worked steadily - 5 reps at a time. It bloody hurt - 55 reps of anything turns a strength workout into a bloody awful cardio/endurance workout.

There were some photos taken by a professional photographer. When I saw them, I have to admit I was horrified. I found them so unflattering. To paraphrase myself, I thought "I look so fat, I need to go on a diet". I promptly deleted all but one from my instagram feed.

I realised that I was being my own worst troll. I had a weekend celebrating the big things that I can do, that I never thought I'd be able to do, and I am getting upset about a few fat rolls. Exercise photos are never flattering, except if you are this guy. And here I am wearing actual lycra, which does a job but shows everything. I get around wearing lycra a lot, and rarely worry about how I look (if people don't like it, they can kiss my squat-enhanced arse). And I figure that any change to diet or exercise needs to come from a place of self respect and love, not self-castigation.

It's a terrible thing I do to myself. Hence I am gonna put my photos up here.

I am proud.

That might've been around rep 30. trying to keep my back active

Hittin' that rower after the wall balls. Legs were jelly

Owwwwwwwmyquaaaaaaaads!

Open WOD 16.3 - Close, but no cigar. Lightbulb moments.

So if you are sick of my CrossFit musings then you will probably wish to click away now.

Still here? Good!

Todays workout was

7 Minutes AMRAP (as many reps as possible)

10 Power Snatches, 15kg
5 chest to bar jumping pull-ups

I first looked at this workout on the webpage yesterday. I thought "sweet". However I picked up the term "chest to bar" and groaned inwardly. WOD 16.1 (reported here) involved jumping chin to bar pull-ups and I struggled with them. I thought "no way am gonna go chest to bar".

Still, before the WOD (workout of the day), I gave them a go. I tried a few times, changing around my grip. I had no issue getting my chin to the bar (yays) but could not get my chest up to the bar.

I was told that I could only score 10 reps (ie the first 10 snatches). I was disappointed, but still, it's 10 more snatches than I could do a year ago.

I did the WOD as best I could. I thought about not registering a score, but 10 is better than 0 so....

Here is a snatch (minds out of the gutter, folks)...

Though I always used to guffaw when I asked the coaches to look at my snatch....


The full workout had bar muscle-ups rather than chinups. Bar muscle ups are a beast of a move:

During the week I had a 1:1 session with the head coach. Great to learn some skills in a more supervised environment, and gain confidence.

Speaking of which, I am trying to write a paper with the proceeds of my research. I was getting really stalled - worrying about every little word on the page.

I wrote myself this note

I need to remember that my knowledge and my work is just as good as anyone else's.


We all need a lightbulb moment. Sometime's it's a liberating, empowering moment. Sometimes it's a realisation that comes of taking a good hard look at ourselves that makes us uncomfortable. I had one of these realisations this past week - I am not yet comfortable to discuss it on this forum; I could barely bring myself to talk to my partner. But it's all good.

Open workout 16.2 - where I was to where I am now.

Today was the second workout of the Crossfit open, 16.2. The Open is a very big deal worldwide, with big fanfare leading up to the announcement of the workout, with a live countdown and youtube announcement. A bit like the footy grand final or something.

This was the scaled Women's version

Beginning on a 4-minute clock, complete as many reps as possible of:

25 hanging knee raises
50 single-unders
15 squat cleans, 25kg

If completed before 4 minutes, add 4 minutes to the clock and proceed to:
25 hanging knee raises
50 single-unders
13 squat cleans, 35kg

If completed before 8 minutes, add 4 minutes to the clock and proceed to:
25 hanging knee raises
50 single-unders
11 squat cleans, 43 kg

If completed before 12 minutes, add 4 minutes to the clock and proceed to:
25 hanging knee raises
50 single-unders
9 squat cleans, 52kg

If completed before 16 minutes, add 4 minutes to the clock and proceed to:
25 hanging knee raises
50 single-unders
7 squat cleans, 61kg 

Hanging leg raises involve jumping up to hang from the bar, then swinging bent knees toward the chest (knees above hip crease) and repeating. I remember doing this for the first time a year ago, when I first went to crossfit. Jumping up to grab a cold, rough bar and hang your body weight from it was really, really hard! My upper body strength was not great, and my hands baby soft, so there was a searing pain in my hands, and I could only do about 2-3 knee raises at a stretch. Today it was 25, and I did them! 

FYI, here is the full movement that I am working up to, that's in the full (Rx) workout, the toes to bar.

 Skipping is something I can do much better now than when I first came. I can skip like a boss. I can even do a few "double unders", which is where you pass the rope twice underneath the feet per jump - it involves jumping higher and moving the rope really fast. This is in the full workout.

The next movement is the squat clean. Again I had no knowledge of proper Olympic lifting prior to doing Crossfit. Now I have mastered the basic technique, but am still having issues with getting "under" the bar, required to get a heavy weight to shoulders. My squat is getting a lot better, though. You know my opinion on the importance of squatting deep.

My 1-rep max for a clean is 38kg. Hence I struggled with second, 35kg round, especially after doing all the stuff coming before it.

This is probably the only clean I'm working on.... (boom tish)

It was a great morning, where we all cheered each other on. I was particularly inspired by a girl I was working out with, who hit the 43kg round, and was powering through it. Here the grunt, kind of like what the tennis players do, really helps. It releases a hit of adrenaline and endorphins. Getting in touch with the masculine side. 

I would have liked to have done a few more reps during the workout, but I keep in mind that I could have done none of this a year ago. 

I did a bit of self-gifting this birthday.

The first thing was a personal training session with the head coach at the box - master some more techniques. Might do a few. Might get that elusive box jump.

The second thing was a pair of new kicks - Nike sneakers, in black. Badass black.

I am having a wild Saturday night in, watching Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. I had forgotten what a brilliant movie it was, and how great an actor Guy Pearce is.

Crossfit updates. Vacuum cleaners

Happy Sunday evening to you.

I have been doing Crossfit for a year now. I love it, and I love the friends I have made. That progress is slow does not worry me so much.

Every February, there is a worldwide competition called the Crossfit Open. There are Rx (ie only for the very fit) and Scaled (for mortals like myself) divisions.  There are Masters (40+/55+) divisions. There is a set workout or WOD every week for five weeks, which everyone does. The best 30 or so Rx athletes from each geographic area go on to a "regional" competition, and the best of them go on to the Crossfit Games, which occurs in the US in May. It's a big thing in the Crossfit world. Thousands of people enter the open. It reaches a bit of a religious fervour.

We are all encouraged to enter. I forgot my ego, my "oh my God I am going to do so bad and I don't want people to know" tendency, I paid the USD 20 (AUD 29) and registered. The first WOD was on Saturday. The box was set up with all the markers. Some of the more experienced Crossfitters from the box, as well as doing the WOD (workout of the day) themselves, were engaged as judges for the other people doing the WOD. Strict standards are maintained, no corners can be cut. If the rep/movement isn't done to completion, it's a "no rep" and it has to be repeated properly for it to be counted towards the score.

So I rolled up to the box at 0800 on Saturday. People were already doing the WOD, with looks of grim determination on their faces, and sweat pouring off, their clipboard wielding judges marking the movements off and cheering them on. The music was pumping and the atmosphere was buzzing. The coach referred to those doing the open as "open athletes".

The "scaled" WOD (Females) for Saturday, Open WOD 16.1, was as follows

20 minutes AMRAP (as many reps as possible)

7.5 metre walking lunge with 15kg barbell held in front rack position
8 burpees over bar
7.5 metre walking lunge with 15kg barbell held in front rack position
8 jumping pull ups with chin to bar

The standards were as follows
-knee had to hit the ground at the bottom of the lunge.
-whole foot had to clear the 7.5 metre line
-no dropping the bar in the 7.5 metre walk (if dropped -back to start)
-Burpees are chest and thighs to ground, two foot take off for the jump over the bar, head behind bar when prone
-chin had to reach the bar during pull up.

This workout bought out a number of weaknesses. I with a couple of ankle injuries and tight hips, I had been wobbly at lunges and not much good at getting my knee to hit the ground. I was barely mastering them without added weight. I can do burpees but I am about as speedy as a sloth on valium with them. My pull-ups are coming along but that movement I found hard. A few times I jumped and my chin didn't quite reach the bar. The judge yelled "no rep" and I went "fuck" and did it again.

It was really frickin' hard. I remember feeling a bit silly and slow being up to the burpees when some of the others were on the chinups. I even felt a bit sick toward the end. However I did not stop despite feeling tired, in pain and ill. My "judge" cheered me on, even prompted me "left leg, now right leg, come on, big jump".

Later in the workout a few of the other "athletes" come to cheer me on. It really helped. Finally I finished and I did the obligatory toss of the barbell and fall dramatically to the ground to catch my breath and rest. This going to ground is totally allowed and even encouraged. People find your hand to shake or high-five. The judge congratulated me for not taking a rest and keeping on moving throughout.

Even though I got far fewer reps than some of my mates, I was not worried. That I gave it a crack was good. I had always made a few excuses on the basis of being a bit tubbier or less athletic than the other girls, but today no short cuts could be taken. Rather than being embarrassed for being slower, I felt empowered for doing the same thing as some of the fit girls I admire.

I am also getting far less fearful of the box jump - it was something very simple that my coach said that helped me get my head around jumping without hesitating.

I have pulled up rather sore today. My left butt cheek in particular is giving me curry - that glute has been a bit lazy and it had a workout. I am looking forward to what the next week will bring.

My fella and I got some gift cards for Chrissy, and we pooled them, and added some cash, to buy a Dyson Vacuum cleaner. I had been skeptical, as I am about any expensive cleaning appliance, as scrupulous cleanliness has never been high on my list of priorities (ok that sounds really bad).

I took the Dyson for a spin yesterday, after my big workout, and I was impressed and alarmed in equal measure. Impressed because of the amount of dirt it picked up and how clean it made the carpets looked, alarmed because that heap of dirt and dog hair and my hair was filth that we had been wallowing in.

It's kind of cool to use something that somebody has carefully engineered.

Everything you wanted to know about the (Holy Church of) Crossfit.

Howdy! We are on the slippery slope toward Chrissy! I hope you are all feeling cool (ha) calm and collected.

So I have blogged a bit about CrossFit here. Naomi said she didn't know anything about it, and it can sometimes draw quizzical glances from people.

Some people think I spend I lot of time on this kind of contraption.

That is a Cross Trainer.

Ha! They are sooooo 2003. But seriously, very gentle on the joints and a good way to get a good cardio workout.

The whole idea behind CrossFit is as such: constantly varied functional movements performed at high intensity across broad modal and time domains. It is performed in specialised affiliate gyms, called "Boxes". The owners of the Boxes pay to use the CrossFit(TM) name. The coaches have specific CrossFit certification, and usually some other form of fitness qualification. Hence, while the philosophy is the same the world over, there is variability in what goes on in different Boxes.

Each Box has a timetable with multiple classes per day, it is not like a gym where you just rock up and slog it out in your own time on the equipment.

The classes go for an hour, and are formatted roughly as follows:
1. Warm up - can be skipping, running, rowing, mobility or light strength exercises, or plyometric exercises (burpees).
2. Skills - usually concentrating on strength training - for instance we do bench press, dead lifts, pull ups, clean and jerk and snatch.
3. The Workout of the Day, or WOD - a high intensity cardio or mixed session, usually of between 8 and 20 minutes duration. For instance, last week, we did a 500 metre row followed immediately after by a 400 metre fast run. 3 rounds of that with rests as needed in between. It may utilise weights, or  High Intensity Interval Training, or Tabata.

I try and go 4 or 5 times per week. I have noted a big improvement in my speed and strength. I can lift heavy things safely. I know more about my body than I ever did.

CrossFit is heavily associated with the Paleo movement. Hence there is sometimes a religious fervour of participants.

First rule of Fight Club....

They are also very anti "big soda" and "big sugar" and "big food".

There has been a lot of criticism of CrossFit, mostly in terms of its safety. I actually thoroughly researched it on the internet before I started. Some websites said that injury was inevitable (how scary). I had a chat with the owner/head coach before I started and outlined by concerns. He effectively put them to rest. The gold standard of exercise safety is whether the exercises can be scaled to suit pregnant women, and yes, definitely they can. In fact, given the fact that I have been trying to get pregnant, that was one of the first things I asked. I also have issues with the back and knees that occasionally niggle, and that is always taken into account with the programming.

Anybody's experience in exercise is very dependent on those who coach them, and the environment, unless of course they just like to slog it out in the gym in solitude. I have to say that my CrossFit box is very highly regarded in the area (shout out to Charge Crossfit) and I love going there.

Here is why I feel this is the best health related activity I have done in a long time (or ever):

• The exercises are scalable to everybody, and can progress to a full movement. We are encouraged to scale back our exercises as necessary, for practical purposes and for safety. We are never ever made to feel bad for scaling. For instance, there was no way on earth that I could do a pull up, so I started with a ring-row. I am now onto pull ups assisted with bands, and the band is getting lighter as I get stronger. There is an exercise called a box jump which I am working on. I am very scared of the box, so I jump on weight plates, and I am building up the height slowly. I have made significant gains in strength and speed.
  
  

• The coaches are brilliant, they know their stuff, are friendly and approachable, and are always on hand to suggest adjustments to the exercises. They are liberal with their praise when we improve, and this is something I respond well to.
• The environment is friendly and supportive. Everybody cheers everybody else on. The last person to finish a workout will be encouraged until they finished. Some people don't respond well to this attention, but again, I do. I have made some good friends at the box as well.
• The environment is body positive. The focus is, in the main, getting you performing to the best of your ability. Occasionally we have 6 week "challenges" where there are points given for healthy eating, exercise, stretching etc, and the person with the most points wins a prize. This is a great motivator to getting me eating well, but it is not about weight loss. There are people of most shapes and sizes there, and I have learned that athleticism is not always related to a certain body type. As a result, I have become more confident in my own skin, and proud of what my body can do. 
• Getting "out of my mind and into my body" is very therapeutic. There is nothing like a fast workout, or a complex movement to do this. It has helped me managed the stress of the year.
• It puts me in touch with my masculine side. It feels good to lift a heavy weight, grunt, drop it loudly and swagger off. It feels good to "smash" a workout, and give it everything you have.  The macho blokes are onto something. However, I always check myself before I wreck myself.
• The movements are highly functional. I used to do distance running, at the expense of other modalities of exercise, however I can see no reason why I would ever need to shuffle 10 kilometres. Instead, I can lift, I can jump, I can push, pull and sprint. If ever I needed to, I could run 5 kilometres without any stress. For the first time in my life, I have guns (biceps).

So that's me on the topic.

Any questions?

Don't fight the flow, bro.

It is usual that, late in the year, we start to think about setting our intentions for the new year. Some people call them new years' resolutions, but that sounds a bit inflexible. I like the idea of changing the way I approach whatever curve balls life throws at me, rather than doing the same thing every day. Flexible control.

My mate was talking about healthy eating in her blog. As it happens, I have just finished a 6-week challenge with my Crossfit box. We tested a workout at the beginning and retested the workout at the end. I slashed 2 minutes 22 seconds off it. This was me afterwards

Actually not me. I know. We are practically twins. It's actually Annie Thorisdottir, crossfit champ.

I am never one for deprivation, but I did clean up my act. Specifically, I have cut out diet drinks, eaten a whole lot more vegies, eaten less crap generally and started pushing harder in workouts.

It's far easier to eat lots of veg if they are tasty, or configured in an interesting manner. Enter the microplane.

This is the best thing ever, and it makes short work of fennel and red onion to make a really fancy salad. The microplane is not cheap (like $70 bucks) but it is the bomb dot com. Neither is the baby fennel, $2 each at coles. To borrow the parlance from Faux Fuchsia, I mean it's fennel, not gold bullion.

In terms of cost per use, the microplane is a great investment. The veg don't get stuck in there. And we all know that thin food makes us thin.

Physically, I am going for gold. Mentally and spiritually, well, lots of work has been required to keep this on an even keel. I have made no secret of my ambivalence towards Christmas, yet have done my best to embrace the season. However this year has bought a particular set of challenges with it.

I would have thought that, like everything else, the pain of a miscarriage would dissipate with time. Not actually true. The tears that come on quite out of the blue some days have taken me by surprise. Hearing of each new pregnancy in a friend or acquaintance, or seeing a fellow crossfitter with a baby bump will easily precipitate this. I had not expected this to happen, yet there it is. A wise friend told me that this was a particularly hard time of the year for those sorts of feelings. Maybe.

Having finished my PhD, I am now in the market for extra sessions of gainful employment, and these proving hard to come by, for various reasons not appropriate to write here. This, plus the post-goal bottoming out, has been hard too. I have learned, though, that when something is looking too hard to come by, sometimes it is best to back away and change tack. Plan A works better when you have a plan B. I am now making arrangements for plans D and E, and I am feeling good about them.

The extra $$ are very much needed, as home renovation plans are afoot. I know! Exciting and scary! We have engaged the services of an architectural firm to design and project manage the extension. He took us through the concept drawings and 3D render, and it was really exciting to see. Then we talked costs, and bank loans, and that was somewhat less exciting. Unfortunately the design brief "please make us a palatial home at minimal cost" got lost in translation.

So 2016 looks to be a year full of challenges, some of them actually exciting. I was considering my watchword for the year, and I think it will be "patience". The second one will be "flexibility".

To make hay while the sun shines.

To manage, day by day, when things are tough, and get through as best I can.

To not be tired by waiting.

I'm still here....

Oh hai.

I have been here, I have been fine, I have been kicking around instagram, but I have not gotten the head of steam to blog. My thoughts have not been able to form themselves into a coherent post. Today, since it's been so long since I've blogged, it's gonna be a bit of a mish mash.

I have handed in my PhD. Many people say "Oh, you must be relieved". Relieved isn't really the word. It is but one part of the research journey.

When I was pregnant, my thoughts were often directed to my future with baby. After the miscarriage, I ploughed a lot of energy into getting the PhD done, then finding something for myself to do in lieu. Friends, I am in the process of being appointed a postdoctoral fellow, part time.

Is this trying to sublimate/cover up my feelings re the m/c? Probably. But I cope with things by changing tack quickly. We fall down, we get up, and we run in a slightly different direction.

The research is hard work. I am already in the process of applying for outside funding, plus getting data together for papers, plus putting abstracts in for conferences. It pays far less than what I can earn. Yet it is something I enjoy, it's a self-actualisation thing. It plays to my nerdier and occasionally misanthropic tendencies (yes I have both).

And, if not now, then when? Gotta take advantage of the opportunities as they arise, am I right?

I am in dire need of another holiday, yes I know it wasn't long ago I was in Spain but that was partly work and when you work over weekends, the need for a holiday comes very quickly.

To this end, we are off to Penang in Oct.

This is a pic of Batu Ferringhi beach. Looks rather idyllic, but apparently absolutely teeming with jellyfish. Might just stick to the pool.

A hundred things to do in Penang, and, from my Malaysian friends, at least 93 of these things involve food. The rest involve hanging out by the pool or other body of water...very much looking forward to going.

Then a conference in Istanbul in November. Better get my finger out and write that paper. Boss has to let me go there if I have a paper in....

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You know that whole thing about summer bodies being made in winter, well, since the PhD has been handed in, I have been giving that a bit more thought, because, you know, bikini and Penang. Hence I have been training like a demon at crossfit.

Yes I know the bad rap that crossfit gets, I know all the crossfit jokes ("If you are a vegan and a crossfitter, which do you talk about first?" etc).

But bloody ell I love it. I have been doing it of a morning and I just feel like a boss (pronounced baaaawwwwwwwssssss) all day. My pull ups are coming along, I am starting to get more confident with jumping on boxes, and I delight in telling my skinny friends that I would be able to deadlift them (last week I did a 60kg x 7 rep). Next, double unders and world domination.

I love that, without any particular running training, I can go out and run fairly comfortably whenever I like. I went for a little trot round the 'tan with my friend this morning, and it was magnificent. Melbourne has got the memo about it being spring soon and is starting to flirt a little. It has been a long, cold winter and errrrybody looked so happy to be out and about.

I cannot help but admire my new guns when I shower. Oh yes I do.

And they play punk rock or thrash metal while you work out, and that gets me in the mood big time.

My burpees are coming along.


I am feeling very confident in my skin, that is probably the best thing.

I have decided that it is also time to stop the snacking while writing. Hence I am drinking lots of herbal tea....

On the hippie vein, I am also doing yoga, to stretch out those enlarging muscles. I always start out like "na can't be arsed with this, too hippy" and finish out like "I feel marvellous". I never thought I'd see the day.


Anyway I can sense some eyes starting to glaze over at this point.

Being the beginning of spring, I am considering doing a wardrobe cull next weekend. If I don't feel fab in it, out it goes. I have stopped asking people how I look in things, because if I don't feel all "bam" in it, I won't wear it. 'Cept for tracky daks, which I am proudly rocking now.

I need to curate a good work/conference/doing talks wardrobe - "sharp and clever with a bit of quirk" is the look I am going for. Anyone got any ideas?

PS - After I wrote my little outburst re Puffer Jackets I found one at Witchery and luffed it sick so I bought it and I still luff it sick.

The Idiot Box.

It sounds like a cliche, but this time, crunch time, is like the end of a marathon. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel but I am hurting like fuck. My mind is up to the numerous challenges I have (new work, PhD completion, grant writing etc) but during these times of stress, my body shows it.

I get an awful crick in my neck and back from sleeping like a tense mummy, some headaches, and a stress rash on my feet (it's called pompholyx and it's an actual thing). My feet aren't as bad as the pic, but you get the idea.

It's important for me to give myself some physical challenges during these mentally challenging times. Actually most of the physical challenges are mental challenges as well, and it is super rewarding to face them.

I'm talking about de crossfit, people.

Lots of the exercises we do in the sessions are actually variations on things we should have been good at as kids, but I had my head in a book. Things like handstands, pull ups, jumps.

I am super proud to say I am mastering the pull up, and needing less and less support from the elastic bands. I can do a deep squat like a champion without putting strain on my knees or back, and with increasing amounts of weight on the barbell.

I would love to be able to do a handstand, but this is a little way off.

One thing that scares the bejeezus out of me is the box jump. That is jumping onto a 20 inch box, or, right now, for me, it is 3x25kg weight plates stacked up, at a height of about 10 inches.

I don't yet have the appropriate power to weight ratio to get up to 20 inches, and I am working on that by gradually increasing the height of the platform.

The much more difficult thing is the head thing. I am so scared of falling over, of hurting myself (even typing that makes that fear less powerful). The head thing is what limits me most in terms of my physical prowess.

I came across this article on the webs. I am inspired. I will imagine my footsies steadfastly atop the platform. In order to stave off the ravages of ageing, we need to (safely) move more like a child.

In terms of the other idiot box, I am loving Masterchef. Marco is back and I don't like him, but I still enjoy the show.

Do you take yourself out of your physical and mental comfort zone?
What thing do you wish you could do? Splits? Handstand? Pirouette?

Turkish Get-Ups. In defence of trakky daks.

Well happy Sunday to you all!

Melbourne weather had gotten the memo regarding Autumnal weather, with sunny days but crisp mornings, interspersed with the odd bit of rain. However, it has obliged us this weekend with some mild mornings. Such mild mornings are very compatible with leaving the house early (ie 7:45 am) of a Saturday to get some exercise done.

As I think I have bored you with mentioned before, I have really been enjoying Crossfit classes. There are a lot of things I can't do in this class. Jumping onto a 20 inch box is very difficult, for example, and a bit hard on my recovering ankle. However, most exercises can be scaled down then gradually increased as your ability gets better. For instance, I started with jumping on 3 weight plates, about 11 inches off the ground. If I have a lot of jumps to do, I use only 2. I relish the improvement.

The other thing I relish is the new physical skill set. I love being able to do pull ups (even though assisted by bands) and olympic-style weight lifting. A new skill that I learned yesterday was the Turkish Get-Up. I did it without any weight in my hand, to get the movements right. Here it is when somebody does it properly

It is harder than it looks, even without a weight. I went ker-splat a few times. Then, after practice, I got the movement and did 3 in a row, each side. I still wobbled a bit but I did it.

Any complex movement that involves moving your body from flat on the ground to upright in a repeated fashion (eg burpees etc) is very good cardio, as well as working just about every other muscle in the body. These kinds of exercises were developed for the military, as these guys had to get super-fit without a lot of space or equipment. They are great even for us mere mortals!

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Some people are very anti-trakky dak, and won't be seen anywhere with them. That is cool. I have been a long-time lover of the soft pant. Yet as I get older, I get vainer, and now I am after a look that is super comfortable yet nearing trendy. I need weekend outfits that take me from brekky out at hipster cafes, for walks and then, as I am now, to sessions of PhD writing and a bit of stretching during breaks.

Currently the sports luxe look is in. Trakky daks are referred to as Joggers, and some have been appropriated as workwear. I have found a couple of great pairs that can look less bogan with a bit of effort. Behold:

The denim Jacket is from Esprit, the kicks are the most expensive item in the outfit and from Frankie4. The trakky daks are Kmart, $15! Photobombing dog, provenance unknown via the Pound.

Well, I had better get back to doing my PhD writing. On Tuesday I am off to Perth for a conference. I get to present some of my research there, and I am very excited about this. I also get to see some of my Perth-dwelling cousins who I've not seen for ages, and meet up with colleagues at the conference.

I hope that your week goes well.

What have you got planned?

Are you pro trakky daks?<

Fighting back with a bit of awesome

To paraphrase Carly Findlay.

The work pressures continued over late last week, and they were making me feel overwhelmed.

I took the weekend to have a good look at what was going on. To take a few deep breaths and make a plan. To see that the anticipation was worse than the actuality.

I took myself off to Crossfit this morning, when the only sensible thing to do was stay in bed. (Brrrr chilly 6 degrees.)

Among other things, I did this.

That is all for now

Keeping the equilibrium.

In times of stress, I feel I need to very deliberately offset the stress with nice things.

For instance, I spent all Sunday, alone in my work office, working on my PhD. It is in many ways like the last phases of a marathon - you can see the finish but it is hella painful.

I am on leave next week to spend some quality time with this bad boy.

Hence, last Saturday was active relaxation time. I went to a nice local shop called Village Vineyard, the owner of which is a lovely lady whom I have met socially

I only bought the essentials

I got my Namaste on at Yoga.

I got my eyelashes tinted and permed (PS it's awesome), and had a facial. PS. My skin is still a quagmire, despite multiple measures. I see the dermatologist next week. Unfortunately anything very effective for acne is also a no-no when trying for a bub.

I have been doing plenty of exercise. Yesterday I did some pull-ups. Granted they were assisted by a big elastic band around my feet to take some of my weight. However I was super-excited. I have also been lifting heavy weights and perfecting deep squats. Very challenging to the balance.

Here are my badass hand grips which helped my hands not to be chafed to shreds

But some more very stressful news this afternoon sent me into a bit of a tailspin.
It really is a matter of quickly trying to claw the sanity back, psychologically.
The stress acutely intensified my gratitude for the very excellent things in my life. The acute stress lasted an hour or so, then I could raise my eyes above it.

Life really is about trying to keep mental equilibrium among all the vicissitudes. Much like I need to keep my balance while doing awesome crossfit moves by making rapid postural corrections.


How do you regain your equilibrium after a stressor?

The weekend / festival of Cilla.

It's Friyay, people. A quick'un, today.

I am quite pooped, and am taking it easy tonight. Home delivered food on the couch in trakky daks drinking wine out of a tumbler kind of easy.

Dr. Blake's Mysteries is on soon. I love Craig McLachlan. He is a bit of a spunk and like a fine wine, he has improved with age.

I have a big weekend coming up. Tomorrow morning is the monthly WODfest at Crossfit. WOD stands for Workout of the Day. What I love is that they mix things up. Anyway, the WODfest is a 2 hour workout, followed by a BBQ.

Then I need to attend to scheduled bodily maintenance (pedi/eyebrow lopping etc). Then it is the belated 40th bday party of a friend.

Sunday is my birthday. I am having a quiet early dinner at a local gastropub with a few friends. Perhaps brunch with my family.

It is going to be a big foodie weekend. I shall report back on the eats.

I have something from the "annoying" file that I wish to share. I may be alone in this.

I it bugs me when people (shop assistants, often) describe garments as "flattering" or "slimming" on me.
I find it a bit patronising.
I am sure it is coming from a nice place, but still.

Oh yeah. And my fella has announced a sell-off of some of his boy toys, to make room for an ultimate boy-toy (a vintage car of some description).

What are you up to this weekend?
What strange things annoy you?
What boy toy does a man in your life have?
 

If I don't get Fit, I'll get Cross.

Or: CrossFit.

I am fairly consistent with my exercise. That is something I have been getting right. The difficulty is finding the time nowadays, with busy work and PhD demands.

I had been working out with a trainer in a group situation, for about 18 months. Over the last few months, she has become increasingly shouty. There have been the odd threats of more reps if we don't do the ones she said fast enough. If things hurt, we were doing them wrong, rather than her modifying the exercise. There were a few subtle points made about my weight, and she was puritanical about eating and drinking.

One day, after a particularly shitty day at work, I went to her session. It was really the last thing I felt like doing, but I know that I usually feel better after a good sweat. Sure enough, she threatened extra reps if I didn't run up a large flight of stairs quickly enough. So, I started the steps a bit up from the bottom. One of the group dobbed me in. I got accused of cheating, and told me to do it again. I said "no", and looked at her defiantly.

She did apologise and explained that she yelled at everyone to get us to work hard, but I explained that some days are just about ticking things over, the things in your mind too heavy to focus too hard on exerting yourself.

But that was it. I haven't gone back. I don't want to be yelled at. Fuck that.

I had been a bit intrigued by crossfit for a while. I like the idea - broad athletic competence, functional and varied movements. However, it gets a bit of a bad rap on the internets. Inevitable injuries, risk of rhabdomyolysis, overzealous coaches, paleo diets.

There is a crossfit gym (or "box") near my home. My curiosity outweighed my fear, and I gave the boss man a call. I told him about my niggles, asked a few questions. He was super friendly and sensible. I booked in for a trial session, which I did last night. The coach was friendly and knowledgeable, and a stickler for technique over reps.

The trial session was tough but enjoyable. I did a session tonight.

I rocked up at the "box" tonight. There were about 25 others there.  I was greeted by a shirtless young man, with bushy beard, mohawk and a chiselled 6 pack. He smiled broadly and shook my hand hello. I met the trainer from the previous night who greeted me warmly. It was very friendly.

The exercises were very reminiscent of the things that the other kids did at school while I had my nose in a book. Plus pushups (difficult ones). There was skipping, hanging off a bar and bringing knees up (hard on my girly hands) and a trial of handstands. I have a bit of a mental block to throwing myself at the ground headfirst, however the coach staged me through it. I was never any good at monkey bars as a kid, but I shall soon be swinging on a bar.

It was fun. I grunted and sweated and I felt better for it. I look forward to more.

What about you? What would you like to try?