Grace.

You may remember my reaction to my sister's announcement of her pregnancy.

You will probably remember what happened with mine.

It's a hard situation, but I think I have found my peace with it, for the moment.

My sister's baby is imminent. I drove about 80km to see her yesterday, and spend some time with her. We had a lovely time, and bonded. Perhaps the closest we have ever been. My big sister protective instinct has kicked in, and I spoiled her a bit yesterday. Bought the baby a teddy bear, a purple Care Bear. I would've loved a Care Bear as a little girl, but they were too spenny.

As I've mentioned, my sister and I are chalk and cheese, and we have clashed many, many times. I have tried very hard to be supportive to her during this pregnancy, while still honouring my own emotions.

It has involved listening, and saying things like "how do you feel?", "how are you coping?" and "what do you need?", rather than telling her what to do and feel. I know she is feeling anxious, as most first time mothers do, plus they are in a financially very tight situation already.

I got the same treatment back, yesterday. She asked me how I was feeling about the miscarriage thing, listened as I told her about some recent career wins. She didn't try and say "oh don't worry you'll be pregnant again soon". We punned and swore and giggled.

When I got back, I received a text. Care Bear was placed in the cot, awaiting her little friend:

This made me very emotional.

This has been hard, but I have learned the true meaning of grace, and I am proud of this.

I am very much looking forward to being an Auntie.